Dismantling the F-Bomb
Today, I’m talking about one of my pet dislikes. I won’t waste emotion hating something, but this just ticks me off. You’ll see it in many posts and comments, as I’m sure many of you have. What I’m referring to, is the annoying use of ‘f-bomb’ instead of ‘fuck’.
One of the reasons it annoys me is that when you read ‘F-bomb’, what word do you hear in your head? … fuck, that’s what. So what’s the point of making up silly substitutes that immediately slip a fuck between your ears anyway?
The other aspect that pisses me off is grouping an innocent little four-letter word like fuck, with devices designed for one purpose only—to kill people en-mass.
IT’S NOT A FUCKING BOMB! GET OVER IT!
Or as many Americans would say, ‘Get the fuck over it’.
They say it all the time, write it all the time, it is in the majority of films: -, sit the fuck down, shut the fuck up, come the fuck in, go the fuck away, what the fuck! Yet many still insist on using ‘f-bomb’ when we’re surrounded daily by the good, straightforward, honest fuck. Perhaps it’s a way of appearing more socially sensitive, more correct, more bullshit!
It’s in books, movies, TV and music.
In music; welsh rockers Super Furry Animals’ 1996 single, The Man Don’t Give A Fuck, was the first UK Top 40 hit to include 52 fucks.
In movies; Martin Scorsese’ 2013 Wolf of Wall street, tops movie list with 560 fucks, while the ever-popular Goodfellas, weighs in with a very respectable 300.
The origins of the word are not known. But the weight of opinion would indicate that it has been in use since the fifteenth century. We’ve all heard it, read it, said it and most of us have done it; so isn’t it time to get it in perspective?
There’s no compulsion to use it, to say or write it. If you don’t like ‘fuck’, find another way of expressing yourself, something more creative than … I can’t even write it one more time.
And you know what, it’s as handy as all fuck. Just four little letters, but so flexible and multifuckingfunctional, and it falls into many grammatical categories:
As a transitive verb for instance … Micky fucked Carol.
As an intransitive verb … Carol fucks.
As an adjective … Micky’s doing all the fucking work.
As part of an adverb … Carol talks too fucking much.
As an adverb enhancing an adjective … Carol is so fucking beautiful.
As a noun … Micky really doesn’t give a fuck.
As part of a word … absofuckinglutely -or- infuckingcredible.
And as almost every word in a sentence … Fuck the fucking fuckers.
You’ve just survived 26 fucks, without anyone dying, having a coronary, giving birth or turning to ash.